This post is the second of promised stories about people that have impacted me, shown
me Jesus, and brushed past my life in a moment.
[Please Note] I wrote the following in October after a ministry night with Ransom sitting in a bar with a lady I shall call Nan in this post. Many women impacted me during those months. I can never forget. Today I was listening to the song at the end of this post and a flood of memories came back. Because louder than the music, lights, and filth of the redlight district was is a desperate cry for truth to prevail, justice to reign, and healing for a broken world. Oh that we would take our stand for mercy. TM
Our band of women spilled out of the red songthau (a public
transportation vehicle) as dusk was setting on the city of Chiang Mai. Colored lights in the
bars flashed as if alluring the wandering passerby to come see what was concealed
in darkness. Beautiful, Asian women awaited customers as they gathered
around pool tables or sat outside on bar stools.
I was exhausted. My heart was heavy. Another day. Another
battle. Another fight. I was fighting too much for my own journey to Truth, how
could I fight for them? I wanted to be anywhere but on that wicked, sickening
street. God, why did you call me to this
when I lack the gifts, personality, and abilities that are needed here? What is
the point? Is this just a waste of time? I’m the wrong person.”
We were women on a mission to find another ally to prayer walk and mindlessly trotted past Paradise Bar (interesting name,
I know). For no apparent reason we
turned to look back at two ladies sitting outside.
“Hello!” they chimed together.
“Sawadee-kha!” we
smiled as we pressed our palms together in the Thai greeting.
They eagerly invited us come and sit with them. For the next
thirty minutes I sat next to the beautiful Nan. The rain pattered on the roof
above. We played Connect 4 and drank hot tea. Nan tried to desperately to explain
something but the only words I caught in her Thinglish (Thai-English) was doctor, sick, 2 months, came back. Her
eyes cried out to be understood, belong, and for true love.
We got up to leave. She gave us hugs and told us to come
again. I walked out knowing that the enemy would soon be harassing me with “if only you were different you could have
done more, what do you have to offer?” I
asked God to help me hear His voice of truth.
Truth always prevails. Jesus showed me that we were not only
sitting with Nan, we were sitting with Him. He invited us. This was never about what we could do or accomplish. When you sit
with Jesus – you don’t have to do things for Him. You don’t have to say the right
words, give Him intelligent answers, or have a degree…you just have to sit and be with Him.
We stood outside the bar before
we went back to join our group and cried out to the Creator of Nan for victory…but
He won a victory for me. In the battle of doing,
proving, and striving…obedience to come where He invites us to come and go
where He tells us to go is all He truly wants. His Spirit is in us…He is with
us. He is in YOU…He invites you into His very presence to worship Him among the
hurting. To be with Him where His heart is beating. <><
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